Diabolus of the Dead
Tourists lined the streets in the early afternoon, enjoying every shop and attraction their feet carried them to. The days did not last forever on Diabolus; everyone knew they had to take in all they could in the short time available. With so many things to do, it took grand precision and timing to meet their schedules. A challenge to many, but not impossible. Wherever a guest traveled, they were sure to find something worth their while.
Even the popular dining location, "The Stache", was brimming with visitors. Not just anyone could dine at such a high class establishment, but it didn't stop them from trying. Fancy guests with their dry cleaned suits, elegant dresses, and expensive jewelry entered the dining location, their sophisticated mannerisms mirroring the tone of the restaurant. The violinists played their slow, classical tunes to form the mood, and the cloths on the tables were freshly washed. The air smelled of fine cooked meals of only the highest quality. The atmosphere throughout the place was just as it should have been: classy and precise.
"Since when have you sold fish intestines?" a woman's voice spoke in complaint.
"They're not fish intestines, Linda. They're fish eggs," a male blacorite replied, not sounding at all enthused as he stood beside the table.
Linda sat back in the wooden booth, her posture relaxed as she pulled her hocks up onto the seat. Her expression was one of amusement, her lids half-closed in a taunting manner. "Oh, so you're a baby fish murderer, then?"
"No!" the man replied, his brows lowering and mouth fixed in a frown. His glowing mustache and bowtie markings became brighter as he went on, "They're not fertilized so they're not 'babies'. Now will you please keep your voice down?"
A smile pulled across the woman's snout. She put an elbow on the table and rested her chin on her wrist. "I dunno, selling eggs is kinda questionable, Jeevesy. I mean, did you get the fish's consent first?"
The man simply looked at her, his red eyes burning with annoyance. "I am not going to have a debate with you over the moral standards of harvesting fish eggs. Are you going to order something or not?"
The white-skinned blacorite leaned against the table, gesturing to a young female who sat in the opposite side. "Did you hear that, Ginny? Jeeves is a baby fish murderer!"
Jeeves smacked a hand to his forehead and rubbed his aching temples. He let the menus in his arms fall onto the table. The yellow-striped blacorite girl, who sat in the other seat, looked up at him with a grin, "Aww, but fishies are so cute! Why would you want to feed them to people? That's not very nice!"
"For the love of--" the man paused and tried to contain his growing anger. When he replied, his voice was low and calm, but none-the-less stern. "First of all, Ginny, you are supposed to be working, so I don't even understand why you are over here. And you," he turned to the pink-striped woman, who was waiting for his comment with a smile. He took a moment to gather his words before saying, "I shouldn't even let you in here. You hardly act proper enough."
She let out an entertained giggle and reached out to grab one of the menus, "And yet you still do. Sometimes I wonder why myself."
While the woman began to, half-caringly, scan through the menu, Jeeves returned his gaze to the young girl. "Seriously, you need to get to work. Now."
"Okay!" the girl said gleefully. She quickly got to her feet with a peppy hop and questioned, "Whatcha want me to do again?"
The man sighed. "Go into the kitchen and get your uniform for starters. I don't know how many times I have to tell you to wear that."
The girl gave him a rapid little nod, "Okie dokie! I can do that!"
When she began to skip away, the man turned and added, "Don't touch anything while you're in there, either!"
The girl did not reply as she pranced across the room, guests staring after her strangely as she did so; Jeeves only shook his head at her childish behavior. He returned his attention to Linda, who continued looking at the menu. Her gaze was wandering, her eyes clearly not focused on anything the booklet said.
"You're not going to order anything, are you?" he groaned with annoyance.
The woman rested the menu on the table and peered up at him with a smirk, "I dunno, it's just so hard to choose
especially when I keep thinking about those eggs."
"Will you get over that?!" he spat angrily, not realizing how loud his voice had been. He glanced around uneasily as the patrons nearby began to stir and look at them questionably. Their whispers sent a tingle of embarrassment through the restaurant owner, and his stripes lit up more intensely.
He corrected his composure and questioned again, his tone as calm as he could manage, "Will you please order something, ma'am?"
"Mmmm, I just can't decide."
One of the man's eyelids twitched. He leaned in closer, his voice drawing to a whisper, "Linda, I have more important things to do than stand here and listen to your
lovely contemplation. So would you, please?"
The albino replied with a short laugh and reached up to pinch his dark gray cheek, "Aww, does Jeevesy have a play date to go to after he gets done with his hard, backbreaking work?"
The waiter grabbed the woman's white hand and shoved it away, forcefully enough to show his point but not enough to draw attention from the guests, "No, but I do have things of importance that need attending. Things I would like to focus on instead of being stuck here listening to your nonsense."
"Oh really, now?" Linda's smile grew wide, "What could be more interesting than my nonsense?"
The man gave her an irritated glare. "If you really must know..."
"I never said I wanted to know." Linda cheekily responded. She rested her chin on her hand again and stared up at him with a teasing smile.
Jeeves' expression formed into a displeased scowl. He prepared to reply but was cut off by Ginny's quick return. She skipped back across the room and up to her boss, dressed in a hostess uniform. She hopped in place a couple times and said, "'Kay, I did it! The kitchen is really smelly, by the way. It's like the perfume aisles at the mall! Only
"Yes, yes, I know. Now go to the front and sit people at their tables. And would you please try to make yourself seem the slightest bit more professional while you do it?"
The girl stared at him for a moment, her expression blank. She then giggled and replied, "Silly Jeeves, I'm not a professor! But whatever you say!"
She skipped away to the front of the building, humming a little tune to herself. Her boss watched her go, annoyance and disappointment obvious in his face. Satisfied that at least one of his duties had been finished, he returned to his previous obstacle.
Linda glanced at him and humorously asked, "What are you making in the kitchen that smells? Illegal drugs?"
The man's eyes widened, appalled, and he quickly explained, "Of course not! It's just as I was trying to tell you a moment ago. I'm attempting to spice up some of the entrees with a new ingredient, so I'm testing several things out. It's not the easiest thing in the world to do, not like you'd know."
"No, I can't say I would," she replied, still smiling, "but I guess you have to spice up your food if you're serving it with a side of fish intestines."
"Fish eggs! God, I swear sometimes you are just really..."
The albino's smile vanished. Her brows lowered and her head sensors fell atop her shoulders. Tone turning sharp, she questioned, "Really what, Jeevesy?"
Avoiding the woman's angered gaze, the male blacorite averted the subject and replied, "That's beside the point. I need to get it finalized today. I told Harlie I'd finish so he can use it for that ridiculous ad campaign Marty's doing, or whatever the hell it's for."
Linda's expression softened slightly and she tilted her head, "Ah, so I'm distracting you then?"
"Just a little," he said. Putting his hands on his hips, he then spoke sternly, "So either order something or get out. You're wasting my time."
Linda stared at him for a moment, her face unreadable. She leaned back in her seat and set her hands on the table, as if preparing to stand up. "Can I just say something first?"
Jeeves rolled his eyes but complied with a wave of his hand, "Ugh, okay, what?"
Not saying a word, the woman got to her feet. She brushed herself off and stood beside him for a moment. To his surprise, she turned around to face the large room where the guests were sitting and minding their own business. She pointed a clawed finger to the mustached man beside her and yelled loudly to them all, "ATTENTION EVERYONE! THIS GUY IS A BABY FISH MURDERER!"
The room fell silent. The guests turned and stared at them both with bewildered, shocked eyes. In a panic, Jeeves rushed and yanked Linda's arm down. In a vain attempt to restore the previous mood, he called out to his customers, "N-no, no! Don't listen to her! Return to your meals!" Grabbing a firm hold onto the tall blacorite, he nervously told her, "Er
madame, allow me to
escort you out. Now!"
While the man shoved her toward the entrance, she yelled out again, "He rips the babies right out of the womb! Squishes their little beating hearts and serves them in your soup!"
Several guests gasped and gagged at this notion. The room began to fill with questionable murmurs; some people even began to stand up out of their seats. Burning with embarrassment, the suit-marked blacorite shoved the woman harder. Linda played along and simply let him, her paneled smile stretched across her face the entire time.
They reached the front of the restaurant where the yellow-striped hostess then stood, a menu held in her hand. Linda waved at her as they passed, "See ya later, Ginny!"
The teen had no opportunity to reply. The two adults exited the building and Jeeves immediately let the troublemaking blacorite go with a slight shove. Annoyed and angered, he spat at her, "Your attempts at ruining my reputation are getting ridiculous! Get out and don't come back! I mean it!"
"Fine!" Linda stuck up her snout to him. She began to walk away, her tail swishing back and forth behind her. "Good luck with the seafood slaughter!"
Making sure she did not attempt a dash back inside, Jeeves stood there for a moment, letting the chill of the afternoon air cool his burning skin. With the "pest" gone and his temperament relaxed, he hastily returned inside. He brushed past Ginny, who stared after him in confusion.
With red stripes beaming brightly, he called over his shoulder to the young girl, "I'm going to finish my project. Don't bother me!"
Watching him go, she joyously put her hand to her forehead in a salute, smiling wide. "Okie dokie!"